We regret to inform you that we did not select Chicago to host the 2016 summer olympics.
We are not giving you this honor since we agree with John Boehner that Obama should not be allowed to leave the country to represent your city. We think he should have been sitting in his office and thinking about the economy. We also believe that it is impossible for him to do so when he is outside of the United States. No one can think on a plane... even Air Force One.
Also, John Boehner makes mostly all good points, so we had to take that into account.
Sincerely,
The Olympics
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